by Gary R. Collins | posted in Anger keywords Anger, From, Editor:, Back, to, Basics

Anger is not my favorite topic. I don‘t think this is because I’m an angry person, resisting a subject that might hook into my own issues. It’s just that the subject of anger seems so dull, so elementary. I like to be creative, to think about cutting edge issues, to anticipate the future. Like every counselor, I learned about anger in Psychology 101. Why spend much more time on something so basic? Today, people may express their anger in ways that are different from those of the past. Some popular talk shows pull out the voyeurism in viewers and let them watch angry outbursts on TV. But isn’t anger such a basic topic that we could leave it in our introductory counseling courses? Maybe that’s the point. Anger is so basic that we don’t give it much thought, even though it slips in and quietly penetrates much of what counselors do. It’s there when people grieve. It goes hand in glove with depression. It hides below the surface and sometimes boils over when there are interpersonal tensions. It explodes into marriage, rips open families, and tears apart nations. Frequently it festers unrecognized and undetected, making its impact by silently weakening immune systems and wearing down bodies. All of us know that it can be triggered in us by clients who know how to get under our skins. Almost two decades ago, Carol Tavris picked a revealing subtitle for her landmark book on anger. She called anger “the misunderstood emotion.” It can also be a destructive emotion. Of course it can lead to explosive outbursts, but more often it eats away at us, like a cancer doing its undermining work quietly and undetected until the damage has been done. Anger can fuel unhealthy and irrational mental fantasies. We dwell on injustices, mull over how we have been mistreated, or think about things that could happen (but usually don’t). Our anger-directed minds ruminate on scenarios of ways that justice might come. If we don’t stop that self-destructive thinking process, it can pull us into anxiety, fantasies about revenge, and bitterness. When people let anger and bitterness get a foothold, it leads to more anger, snuffs out joy, and ultimately destroys. “Others may hate you,” Richard Nixon said to his
staff on the day he left the White House. “Those who hate you don’t win unless you hate them. And then you destroy yourself.” Such is the destructive power of anger. But anger also can be positive. Anger motivates. By all reports Martin Luther King, Jr., was a gentle man, but surely his anger over injustice energized and motivated him to lead the civil rights movement that changed America for the better. Gandhi did the same with his non-violent crusade against injustice at another
time and in another place. Anger cleanses. Remember when Jesus arrived at the temple and found the money changers? He overturned their tables and benches, stopped people from carrying merchandise through the temple courts, and accused them of turning God’s house of prayer into a den for robbers(Mark 11:15-17). His righteous anger cleansed the temple and challenged the religious leaders toward purity. No wonder they wanted to
kill him. Anger liberates. When we admit our anger we are freed to do something to bring change. Once Jesus saw a man with a shriveled hand,
surrounded by surly theologians waiting to pounce if Jesus healed on
the Sabbath. He looked at the critics in anger and deep distress but felt free to heal the man (Mark 3:1-5). Anger can be a catalyst for
resolving interpersonal conflicts. It can give us a sense of control during times of intense stress. The God who made us emotional beings
gave us the ability to experience anger, express it, use it for good,
and then let it go. Anger may be basic to our lives and our professions, but few issues are more relevant, more pervasive, and more important to people who spend their lives helping others. A grasp of anger’s complexity is basic to effective counseling.